Amazing what feeling under the weather does

It's been a rough week, spring break seems to have brought on a spring cold.  Not particularly thrilled with that, it's been fevers, chills, the runs, headache season.  Wayne says that was mild compared to what is happening at work.  I didn't make it to the gym this week at all, and tomorrow is the whale count, so won't make it then.  I did get in my 2 EA Sports Active 2.0 sessions, and pulled a third workout off this morning. Boy have they been making me sweat.  Wayne is worried that it is the fever, so no walking today.  I have noticed a spike in my blood pressure and resting heart rate, although the resting heart rate is getting closer to the 68 bpm of last week, my diastolic pressure is back up in the 90s.  Systolic is recovering, post exercise this morning I am 131/98, 76 bpm.

Tonight I will have six classmates over from my social work 607 class, and we will be videotaping a mock ho'oponopono session at the house.  Not familiar with ho'oponopono?  I was/am not either.  So out to wikipedia I went (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ho'oponopono).  Ho'oponopono is based on ancient Hawaiian/Polynesian practices of reconciliation and forgiveness.  I guess it goes back to the old days, where if you did something kapu (forbidden), if you made it to Honaunau, you were forgiven.  It is practiced by healing priests, sometimes combined with tapping.

It will be interesting to see how this goes, and to apply it to my life with my family -- back in NY, that is.  I'd very much be interested in understanding and embracing the concepts, and then going back and applying them.  There is still so much anger and irritation and hurt, much of which I also caused, that resounds inside me.  Forgiveness and letting go are what I would like to be.

So, I will get out the video camera, well, cameras, and record our session from three angles, and then edit them together.  It will be fun, and I'll get to showcase off some of my own skills to the ladies, which totally differ from theirs.  A number of them have participated, or at least watched a ho'oponopono session, so they will hopefully be the social workers, and leave the ha'oles (white chicks) to be the clients.  I will post some of the video via link here this week.

I think I mentioned this before, but I am currently a Masters student (again!) in social work at the University of Hawaii.  I had spent a lot of time talking with Wayne, and wanting to give back to the community that I have survived -- the Army, and its families.  Well, I went to Schofield Barracks this past week, and interviewed at Army Community Services within the Family Advocacy Division.  I got a placement for my summer internship!  At the newborn outreach clinic.

As I continue down my path, and without divulging any client information, I'll be keeping folks here in touch with how I am doing, and any changes this will bring to my life.  I cannot wait to start - going in to work in the morning, I dread the drive.  I have spent the last year being useless, and doing many projects in order to get promoted to lead associate.  Well, my assessment is done, and I am a week or so away from finding out the results.  I both dread and eagerly await the news.

Now off to the shower and the dreaded job.  Tired, unmotivated, but looking forward to tonight, and to the last whale count of the season tomorrow morning in Hawaii Kai!