On Kauai

Deep sigh. Roughly 9 months ago, Wayne and I planned a hiking trip out to Kalalau over the "Founder's Day" weekend (I still call it Columbus Day). This was when I first returned on to active duty, and was feeling pretty darn good having hiked out to Hanakapi'ai. Then came the return to active status, daily PT, and lots of walking/running/etc.

Some time in May, I stopped PT altogether due to the incremental stress on my already damaged ACL, and began the process of going to Orthopedics to arrange for the revision surgery. So, no hike to Kalalau for me. :(

This morning at about 6am I dropped off Wayne and Brooke at the trailhead. It started to rain, got heavier, so I waited, but no aborted hike. I'm now back at the Westin in Princeville and about to go out and walk for three to four miles along Hanalei Bay. Not quite the same, but blessedly without a knee brace! Yes, awesome news yesterday at the surgeon's office. Fully on track with the recovery, I just need to get to the 5 degree hyperextension of the knee that my right one displays, and I'm about fully operable. True full healing won't happen for about another 4 1/2 months, but I'm well on the way. I got to throw out the knee brace in his office yesterday!!! And I'm using the stationary bike, the elliptical trainer, walking backwards (!) on the treadmill, and using weights.

There's a really nice gym here at the resort, so I'll be in there in the evenings to complement my morning walks.

Oh, and did I mention the spa nearby where I will get my massage???

It should be a good weekend with pictures, planning on walking the golf course path, going to Waimea Canyon, and kayaking on the Hanalei River. More to come.

Just wish I had been well enough to be out on the trail, but with the rain, might be better off at the resort. =]

Aloha!

p.s. Shout-out to Dad -- Happy Birthday! I called the Cull House, your gift certificate should be in the mailbox today.

The Other "C" Word

And body rehab begins. I started on my low carb diet yesterday, actually looking to follow the Weight Watcher's plan again without the weekly weigh in. I was graduated from the stationary bicycle to the elliptical machine in pt yesterday, and continued to work with weights, increasing the number of sets rather than the weight load. I still suck at balancing on my left leg, but I think I sucked at that even before I had surgery. Then it was four hours of Booz work, followed up by meeting Wayne at the gym at Schofield to start upper body weight training again. I'm getting back into a groove, I have to!

I know that the "c" word has many connotations, and although "can't" resonated most loudly with me over the weekend, there is one that is even more oppressive: "cancer." So many people in my life have been touched by the disease. My father's baby brother died of Hodgkins and Non-Hodgkins lymphoma, his mother of advanced lung cancer at the ripe age of 82. My mother is a breast cancer survivor. My friend Janet's mother is not. I go to the dermatologist anywhere from 2-4 times a year to deal with actinic keratosis -- pre-skin cancer cells. My father has had to have a chemical facial peel to deal with his skin cancer cells. My high school health teacher's wife just died of lukemia.

And now my sister's mother in law has been diagnosed with small cell lung cancer, very advanced. They took her to Sloane Kettering last Friday, but the results are only with my sister and brother in law. They haven't told her, or her husband. This is a horrible disease, with even more horrible treatment that doesn't even truly cure a person.

It's October -- breast cancer awareness month. Do yourself a favor. If you are 40 or over, schedule a mammogram (boys get breast cancer too, by the way). Mine is due in November. Find a cancer walk and either donate money or your own two feet to walk it. Susan G. Komen foundation has hundreds of them. Wear someone's name on your shirt and walk either in celebration, or in memory. 1 in 5 women will be struck by the disease. Early diagnosis is the only saving grace, so do your self exams and get those mammograms. Especially if someone in your family has already been diagnosed.

I'm registering Wayne and me to walk the October 19th race for the cure in Honolulu. I hope some of the rest of you do the same!

Aloha!

The "C" Word

Of all the things I hate in the world, the "c" word is among the top, and the most frequently heard these days. Can't. I HATE that word.

It was drill weekend, but not too terribly bad. I had to weigh in, which was distressing, as I have been active, but not my normal active self over the past month. I've gained about 8 pounds. Yuck. Luckily, I can do the stationary bicycle now, and will be doing so starting tonight when I meet the spouse at the gym on Schofield.

Day one of drill was a farewell for the General, who is retiring, followed by a trip to the movies with Wayne. We saw Nick and Norah's Infinite Playlist. Not something I would normally choose, but my two preferences were not playing at the theater in Kapolei. It was cute.

Day two I was on my own in the office, writing OERs, awards, a request for orders and access to the Japan classified network, and doing mandatory training. Not another soul from my section was present, the office was freezing, and the knee throbbing. At the end of the work day, I headed home to wait for Wayne, who was out hiking with Brooke on their final preparation for the Kalalau Trail. That's when I heard the "c" word. I was told that they took an alternate route down from the top of the pass, essentially rock climbing, and they decided that I can't ever take that route down.

I was upset with that proclamation. More than a little, in fact. I explained that the things that I won't be able to do once the knee is healed generally involve sharp pivoting motions, like on a basketball or volleyball court. The verdict was modified to "can't for now."

That's still the "C" word.

Between my girlfriend's marital trouble, my sister's mother-in-law's extreme illness, my sister's marital strife, my throbbing knee and the "c" word that cuts out activities I enjoy, I was upset. In fact, there were a few tears. I went out and snuffled to Wayne, and told him never to use that word in my presence again! He scrunched up his face and was about to say something, and I must have given him the look, because he revised whatever words were to be spoken to "we should go up that way rather than down."

And, later, while making dinner, I got an unsolicited "I love you," which helped a lot.

Good God, am I menopausal, or do I need to go back on the Strattera??

I've been feeling disjointed, emotional and just not myself over the past week, which was my first week back to work. Thank goodness it's only 50%, I would have failed miserably at every task. Even when blogging, I jump from subject to subject at an astonishing speed without any obvious connections (even for me)!

So, it's back on the Strattera, and back to the gym today. Hopefully, the combination of these two things will bring my brain and self back to normal.

And I'm abolishing the "c" word!

Aloha.

Gray days

Sorry so quiet over the past week and a half -- I have actually been in a bit of a slump, realizing that full time work is looming and I am not nearly quite ready to go back mentally. Couple that with a lot of rain, my girlfriend's diminishing reconciliation prospects, an inability to get out and walk due to aforementioned rain, and ridiculous inability to park at Tripler to go to physical therapy, and you have an unhappy redhead.

I had been told of my new position, working on the Guam joint enterprise architecture project out at NCTAMSPAC, which was exciting! I'd be working close to Wayne and close to home. We were already planning commuting, and going to the gym in the evening, stuff I really wanted to do.

And then, silence. Turned out that two lead EA folks from McLean are coming out to Hawaii for six months, and my spot in the workplan disappeared. Now, my boss was scrambling to get work for me. And recommended me for a project at PACOM in an area with which I am not familiar.

I know, good opportunity to learn something new, but if anyone out there knows the landscape at PACOM, parking is abysmal. I'd wind up at the bottom of a very large hill each day, having to walk it to work. Up is not so bad, it's down that's a problem. A long, steep down.

:(

Cue music, magically my short term disability was extended by 30 days until the end of October, so no need to grasp out at work right now, and another 30 days of healing!!! That takes me up to just before we leave for our Mediterranean cruise, so I ought to be in full swing by the time I get back. :)

So let's see, what's been going on? Besides having to reschedule several PT sessions due to no parking at Tripler, and not walking. Hmm. We had Eliot for the weekend for the first time since he headed out to UH as a freshman. It was good to see him. We hadn't heard from him in a while, so I texted him, asking if he was ok, enjoying school, and would he call his dad. He's good when I text him that way. He called Wayne that day and made the arrangements to come over. We went out to the India Cafe for dinner that night, and the next day walked to Denny's for breakfast, got to see Burn After Reading (darkly wicked, better than In Bruges), and had dinner out.

Sunday, Wayne and Brooke hiked the Hau'ula trails in preparation for their Kalalau hike next weekend (I was originally going as well until the surgery came along), and I sat under a tent and did my pt exercises. FINALLY heard from my girlfriend (she's been off the radar for over a week), although it wasn't promising for reconciliation. I walked (with sunscreen on) for about 15 minutes on the beach, only to burn my shins. You should see the patches where the brace was. But the water was soothing, and I was able to relax.

Finally got my friend out of her house on Monday to go walking -- she came Tuesday as well. Things are not boding well for her, her husband told her he feels empty inside, but doesn't want her to make any decisions until he returns from helping his mother on the east coast. I think she's ready to file, and she is mentally cataloging how they will split up the house, where she will go, and what she will do. Wasn't able to get her out this morning, but I think that was because he was still there. Sigh.

She brought me to my pt session on Tuesday, where I had great news. No longer need electric stimulation on my quad, the muscle is firming up, and not quivering when I contract it. We changed my routine to include weights and walking backwards (!) on the treadmill. It really looks like I have graduated to phase 2 of recovery.

I did my walk this morning (I was looking at the Nike+ website, and realized that the knee injury really started bothering me in May, when I stopped walking altogether), and was pleasantly surprised to see I have finally hit the 500 mile marker! I'm establishing a goal for myself of 25 sessions in the month of October, and I plan to meet or beat that goal!

Time for home pt exercises and a drive downtown to Booz Allen to pick up my computer and let my boss know I'll probably be working half days, mostly from home during the next 30 days.

His ears were burning -- he just called and is pleased to know that he doesn't have to find work for me for a few more days...and wants me to submit my timesheet!

:)

Ok, back to exercising and getting ready for work.

Aloha!

Dog Days of Summer

Dwindling away, at the very least.

So what does one do when stuck at home with not a heck of a lot to do? Go online to apple.com and buy the new iPod Touch with Nike+ iTunes and a pair of in-ear headphones.

What does one do when one's good friend will not leave the house because she is so bummed with the state of her marriage? Play on her sympathy for her dog and your crippled state and ask to meet up on a walk around the neighborhood. I'm very proud to say that I've done so two days in a row since the Touch arrived and will probably do so again tomorrow morning (her husband returns from the mainland tonight, she will probably need the stress break, as will the pup).

Both days I've come just shy of 3 miles, and she has had an ear and shoulder on which to lean. The morning yesterday was hot, we ran into another friend and her dog on the loop as well (thus the two happy faces above). While she was not amenable to getting the toenail intervention accomplished, she was to a wine interlude in the afternoon. So home I went, showered and shaved my legs (can't go to the salon with hair growth!), and then out for a pedicure and a trip to the shrink.

Yes, I see a shrink, but for ADHD treatment. Late in life diagnosis. Let me tell you that Strattera has made a significant difference in my life. Something about sharing your life with a psychiatrist (this referral is about my hubby) makes you more amenable to therapy. Or less. For me it was more.

But I digress.

Back home I came, changed clothes, activated the girlfriend network (meow, meow, meow!), and dragged a bottle of wine over. We sat and talked for quite a while, even after her daughter came home, and through the spousal unit texting his whereabouts.

Believe it or not, I was waiting for that text. The night before he announced his hiring at Schofield was up in the air as they were reneging on the salary offer, and that he might be out of work in two weeks. Augh! Thankfully, when he announced his intention to leave, the hospital came to their senses.

I still digress. But that was stressful.

Anyway, we talked and ate and then came home. Later, in the wee hours of the morning, hubby and I had a good talk about the situation and I got to voice lots of questions. It was a wonderful discussion, and I relaxed to the point of being able to sleep until 7 am!

This morning, I met up with my girlfriend and we walked the loop again. Lots of good discussion, plus hugs and doggy kisses from her pooch. She will pick up her husband at 6 tonight, and there is sucky emotional time ahead for her. I told her I would stop by on the walk tomorrow morning, and force her out of the house.

I'm rambling, rambling, rambling. I hope I'm helping her, and I'm being there in the right way. I've taken on fielding the questions from the other girlfriends in the network, and am trying to channel the spouse in a way where I am moderately impartial, while at the same time extremely defensive of her.

:(

Like I said before, I'm learning.

Anyways, now watching the Cubs win (go, go, go!), and typing, getting ready to activate more of the girlfriend network and shower now that the pt exercises are done for the day.

On the plus side, I love, love, love my new iPod Touch!

Now to let that enthusiasm bubble over to supporting my friend.

Aloha.

Meet my torturer

Or is it my incentivizer?? SGT Price from the Tripler Physical Rehabilitation Center.

Tuesday was a bad rehab day. Really bad. Tight, painful, locking knee. Par for the course, I think that it's just that I'm screwing up somehow and not measuring up to expectations. SGT Price has a different suggestion. I'm doing too much.

No way. Not me. (I hear that snorting)

Hmm. Let's turn our crutches upside down and take a look and see what's happening.

Oh. Maybe I am doing a little too much.....but how can walking be bad for you? Definitely bad for the crutches.

Anyways, I took yesterday off from stretches and strengthening exercises, spent quality time manipulating the knee and icing down (after finishing yet another paper). And sleep, I did that quite a bit as well. Guess I'm catching up finally. Wayne came home, and it was out for haircuts and dinner.

So this morning I was skeptical of my ability to progress, go figure.

I took off the brace, noticed very little stiffness in the knee, and didn't have the customary 2 minutes before the knee was warm on the bicycle. I did my quad sets and actually saw the formation of a quadricep muscle. I lifted my leg and there was no lag behind the knee!

And it just kept going well, deepest squats I've been able to do thus far, pressing 60 pounds on the leg extension, adding a 3 pound weight to my ankle on the hamstring curl. It was great! Plus I noticed a change in the swelling of my knee. First shot is 10 days ago, second shot today:

It almost looks like a knee, only bigger.

Now as for my girlfriend, she had an extended talk with her husband this morning, and I went over at lunchtime with wine and cheese in hand. Well, wine and poke. We both had a glass, and she seems to be doing quite well, better than I would be. She has quite an extended support family here in Hawaii (in addition to her actual family), and we're all rallying behind her. I left her after an hour as she was heading with her eldest to the mall. She wants a return visit so we can use the hot tub and drink some more wine. I can probably handle the wine, but may need to avoid the hot tub for a week or two more...must ask doctor...also must ask about extending the short term disability another 4 weeks at 20% so I can go to pt two days a week without having to worry about making up the time.

And my new Nike + iTunes iPod Touch arrived in the mail today! Now getting the old one ready to ship back home, along with my 3rd gen Nano. They'll get more use there. And I can now start tracking my miles! With the assistance of the old crutches, that is.

Aloha!

No, no, not work!

Ok, I admit it, I've liked being home this week for the most part. I've caught up on a lot of sleep that seemed unobtainable due to knee pain in previous weeks, plus all my school work is up to date. But the 24th looms ever closer...it's my plan to get 20% for another 4 weeks or so so that I can go to pt twice a week without fear of having to make up missed hours of work.

I so need to win the lottery.

Add to that a girlfriend in crisis. She discovered (quite by accident) that her husband had co-signed a loan on a Lexus (!) with someone, and then found hundreds of phone calls to one number over the past 10 months on the cell phone bill. She called the number, and at the other end was a Korean woman who wouldn't identify herself (can't say I would). Found out that the woman had already picked up the Lexus.

Her husband first denied knowledge of the co-signing, and then relented saying that the woman was only a friend.

Did I mention that the call frequencies increased over the course of the last month?

Anyway, she's now not sleeping/eating/etc, something with which I am familiar, having dropped down to 147 pounds at one low point in life, and using sleep inducing products...all too familiar.

Time for an intervention, and time to focus on being a good girlfriend, something with which I am not completely familiar, for which I apologize to all girlfriends past, present and future. After almost half my life living alone (with the exception of my Korean roomies and hubby), I've pretty much stayed isolated from people, and tried to rely on very few at all.

So, if anyone has girlfriend like tips, they are appreciated. I'm starting out with wine, cheese, and the lure of either a movie or pedicure. I'm thinking the pedicure is the one that will win out.

:(

I think we'd all rather go diving so that we didn't have to talk, but since that isn't an option, we'll see how toenails go.

Aloha.